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Rewards

I have been trying to figure out what I could reward myself with as I continue to take care of myself, slim down, and make better choices.  Normally I would have said we could go out and eat, or get a decadent dessert.  Ummmm, no longer a good option.  So after talking it over with Bear we have decided that he is going to buy me something that I would not normally buy for myself each time I reach a new belt level.  I have 2 friends who are having jewelry parties  before Christmas.  So I am picking out a couple of items that he can give me after each graduation.  I don’t wear jewelry very much – I generally am not that put together!  But I found a ring that I like and I love bracelets.  Sooooo – I ordered the ring and a bracelet. I get the ring as soon as it comes in and he will give me the bracelet once I earn my yellow belt.  I wonder what I will order at the other friend’s jewelry party????

I have noticed something interesting.  The stronger I have become through TKD, the more I have embraced my feminine side.  I have started to wear make-up again.  I want to wear clothes that look nice.   I am paying attention to my hair (though my hair is definitely not paying attention to anything that I tell it to do!).  I am keeping my toe nails painted.  I took a long soak in the tub the other night.  Just an interesting little change.  Maybe it is that I don’t feel like I need to try to blend into the background anymore – that I am no one except Little Bear’s and Baby Bear’s Mama, and Bear’s Wife – that I am worthy to be someone in my own right.  I don’t know.  I try not to delve too deeply into my own psyche – it is scary in there!

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